The first time I can remember watching Spirited Away was way back in the time of portable VCD players. My mum had brought my siblings and I to queue for passports (this was also way back when you had to wait for ages instead of waltzing in on the time you chose online) and the movie was Spirited Away. It was also – inexplicably – in Chinese, but perhaps that shouldn’t have come as a surprise because I watched a fair amount of anime in Chinese when I was young even though the language has never been my strong suit. 

I must have enjoyed the movie enough because I watched it again in English and was told that the voice actress for Chihiro was the same voice actress as the one for Lilo in Lilo and Stitch. Once I learnt that, I could not unhear the voice and that was probably a big reason why I never watch anime dubbed in English. 

But the shock about an anime character sharing the same voice as a Disney character didn’t stop me from going through the Ghibli catalogue, building a love for Howl’s Moving Castle (rather embarrassingly, I could not read the books when I was younger because it was too different from the movie, now I love both), Kiki’s Delivery Service, Ponyo, and even Tales from Earthsea (another case where I saw the movie before I read the book and now can enjoy both, even if the author does not). 

Still, I never really identified as a Ghibli person. I mean, I’m just not that big of a fandom person and anyway, at that time, I was somehow labelled as a Hello Kitty fan. 

That said, when you live in Japan, you can never really run from Ghibli. My first year was in Tokyo and our university campus was only a few stops from the Studio Ghibli museum. Obviously I went there, though my memories are fuzzy; I remember not being able to take photos, exclusive short films, and also a giant catbus. 

In university, I signed up for a course on Hayao Miyazaki’s films, mostly because it looked interesting. As a course that was also offered to exchange students, it was also offered in English which I found was a bit of a demerit. It gave me the opportunity to watch even more Ghibli films that I had previously overlooked, but I also remember being frustrated when some of my coursemates refused to look at the Japanese material I had found because they found it too difficult. (Meanwhile, one of my unexpected joys of coming to Japan was the ability to find a lot more literary criticism of one of the books I wrote an essay on; it was a Japanese novel and there is not much literature in English whereas there was a lot more in Japanese.)

And before I knew it, I was turning twenty-one and had to choose a theme for my birthday. I don’t know why, but I chose Ghibli (probably to put to rest the idea that I was a fan of Hello Kitty). 

It turned out to be a blast. 

My friends flew in from Japan and together, we toured Singapore and cut out a giant silhouette of Totoro and tons of small sootballs to serve as party decorations. 

Invitation cards were drawn by a friend and featured catbus, kodama, and Jiji the cat. 

I turned the party into a cosplay competition and was very gratified when all my cousins showed up in costume (the prize was a DVD album of Joe Hisaishi’s Ghibli works so one music-loving cousin was particularly motivated to win). 

The cake was also Ghibli-themed and it came with Ghibli cupcakes – we even brought it in all the way from Malaysia! 

And so I confirmed myself as a Ghibli fan. But not like, a crazy fan, you know. I didn’t buy a single T-Shirt from Uniqlo when their Ghibli collection came out, if that helps my case. 

This past year, however, I have been forced to face the fact that I am, in fact, a Ghibli person. 

It’s not just that my friends buy me cute Kiki teacups and I buy them cute Totoro teacups.

It’s not that I went for a tart baking class because there was a Totoro tart (I told myself it’s because I had a voucher to use). 

It’s also not because I spent $50 on Totoro cookies (okay, that one was a pretty big sign that I was in denial about how much I love Ghibli).

It’s because of Okinawa and a second baking class.

Okinawa because I planned to go to a Ghibli store. This is big for me, I probably seem like I spend too much money on tea and teacup and books but I rarely buy merchandise. There was a Ghibli store in Fukuoka but apart from teas, I don’t think I bought that much from it! But this time, I was so excited to go to the store. It helped that all my friends were fans of one fandom or another and we can enable each other’s purchases, but I went to the Ghibli store dying to get a Totoro blanket that’s kept in a Totoro case (i.e. it’s a Totoro plushie with a blanket hidden inside) and I got it. 

And just this past week, I booked a private class to learn how to make… Ghibli-inspired macarons. I had already decided that I wanted to take a baking class during the Hari Raya break this week but I wasn’t forced to book the class, I could have chosen a bread class that I had a voucher for. But the lure of the Ghibli macarons was too much to resist. 

I have absolutely no regrets. Perhaps because it was a private class, we made macarons of five characters rather than four and I brought back a ton of extra mini macarons made with extra macaron base and filling. For my own memory’s sake, the list of flavours are:

• Vanilla and Grape Otori-sama (Spirited Away)
• Chocolate Kaonashi (Spirited Away) – the bonus macaron character!
• Cheddar Jiji (Kiki’s Delivery Service)
• Cream Cheese and Cereal Soot Sprites (Spirited Away)
• Speculoos Calcifer (Howl’s Moving Castle)

I’m also ridiculously pleased at the dominance of Spirited Away in the characters I made. It wasn’t planned but since Spirited Away was the first Ghibli movie I watched, it has a special place in my heart.

And yes, I had to admit to myself: I am very much a Studio Ghibli Person and I must take care not to be too insufferable about it. 

P.s. if you’re wondering if I wrote the whole post just so I could post Ghibli photos, you are right. This was a bit of an inspired mess (I took less time writing it than with the other essays I wrote recently) and all criticism is welcome.